It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Frank: All right, now, pretend that this shoe is an unboned chicken. And you're gonna cook it tonight, make a tasty dinner. It's gonna smell all through the house like cooked chicken.
Beth: Actually, I'm vegan.
Frank: Okay then pretend this shoe is whatever you people eat. Maybe it is a shoe.

Frank: I got my magnum condoms and a wad of hundreds; I'm ready to plow!

Charlie: I'll pull a Good Will Hunting. (To the frat boys) What's your major dude?
Frat Boy: Economics
Charlie: (In Boston accent) Oh, I bet you read a lotta Gordon Wood, huh? You read your Gordon Wood and you regurgitate it from a textbook and you think you're wicked awesome doin' that, And how 'bout 'dem apples? And all that Gordon Wood business.
Frat Boy: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Other Frat Boy: You are an idiot.
Mac: You are an idiot.