Amanda Knox och mordet på Meredith Kercher i Perugia

Then I headed for Meredith’s house. With all the
running around I did, I think it would have been around
8:30, approximately. Because we were supposed to
see each other at that time, even though I didn’t have a
watch I tried to arrive on time, because I usually arrive
late. As I arrived in front of the house, I noticed a white
car with headlights on, and a Drug-Dealer I often saw
on Garibaldi Avenue, but I didn’t make much of this,
and I went into the yard. I knocked on the door, but no
one answered. I went downstairs to the guys’ place,
but no one was there either. So then, I waited in the
yard.

Some time later, here's Meredith, she was smiling, and
asked me how long I’d been waiting, and I told her for
about one minute. She smiled, then took the keys out
of her purse, opened the door, and we entered. There
wasn't anyone in the house because it was dark
everywhere, in the kitchen, in the living room, then she
yelled "Anybody here," to let people know she was
back, but there was no answer from the other rooms.
Even though I’d bought some drinks with the kebab, I
needed to drink some more because it was very spicy,
and I asked her if I could drink something. She told me
to help myself as if I was at my place. I opened the
fridge and drank some apricot juice and water too.
Since she wasn't paying attention, I drank out of the
bottle because I didn't know where the glasses were,
and then I sat down.

I don't know what problems she had with Amanda, but I
heard her complaining, so I got up and went to her
room. I saw she was furious and she said- her exact
words- "That whore of a doper." Heavy words for two
people who were friends. Then I asked what had
happened. She said she couldn't find her money and
she showed me the drawer next to the bed where she
also kept her lingerie. "Maybe it was a thief," I said. But
we saw there was no sign of a break-in, neither inside
nor outside the house. So it had to be someone from
the house and she was complaining only about
Amanda, and not about the other two girls who lived
there. From there she went to Amanda's room to see if
there were signs of forced entry in her room but there
weren't any. Then she opened Amanda's drawer, and
I saw her money wasn't there. Meredith knew where
Amanda kept the money and she became (furious”).

Also, I checked the other rooms but everything was in
order. So I tried to speak to her and calm her down,
saying that a girl shouldn't get upset or she'll get
wrinkles, and she laughed. I told her to laugh because
everything would eventually work out. It was enough
to wait and speak to her (Amanda) and to the other
girls, if they knew something. She calmed down and
talked about the previous evening, the party, me, and
her. We were more or less similar. From what I
understood, her parents were separated and this had
affected her teenage years. She was more or less like
me, not much extroverted. I also had- in different
ways- a perturbed childhood and adolescence, I told
her, but one falls down and then gets up. She had
something special. She asked me about my life, my
parents. I told her I had many mothers and fathers and
brothers/sisters, but none of these would be mine
forever, and she understood that I had lived with many
families, and I don't have true parents, and she told me
it's better to have many than having none.
We talked and at this point I told her that I needed to
go to the bathroom, the kebab was bothering my
stomach. She said I could go to the bathroom near the
fridge, and I went. While I was in the bathroom I heard
the sound of the doorbell. I am sure because it rang
more than once. Then I put my headphones on and
listened to my Ipod. During the time I was in the
bathroom I listened to my favorite three songs. While I
was listening to the last one I heard screaming, even
though the volume was loud, very loud screams. I
wasn't even finished yet, I tried to go and see what had
happened as soon as I could. I opened the bathroom
door…

I went out, but in the living room and kitchen there
wasn't anyone, so I went toward Meredith's room.
There was the back of this person inside the room and
I said "Hey what’s happening?" Then I immediately
saw Meredith's body on the floor and I also saw blood,
and I said "What the f**k have you done?" I yelled, and
the person turned around. He was a male, he was
Italian because he insulted me and had no foreign
accent. He had the knife in his hand and he tried to get
me. I tried to shield myself with my hand but it was a
sharp knife. Only brushing against me, it made small
but deep cuts. Like a scalpel, it only needs to brush
against you and it cuts. I hadn't zipped up my pants
and while backing off I fell. He tried to attack me but I
took a chair to protect myself, being stronger than him.
Although I had a chair and he had a weapon, he exited
through the front door telling me "black man found,
guilty man found," he yelled.

I got up and went to Meredith's room. She was all
covered with blood. Her neck looked like a river, she
was asking for help. I kneeled next to her and tried to
close the wound, I never saw so much blood. I went to
the bathroom, took a towel, and it was soaked. I took
another one, but darn, nothing. So much blood was
flowing that the wound wasn't even visible. I asked her
what had happened and she was repeating that sound
"AF, AF, AF." I tried to write somewhere. Since my
hands were all covered with blood, I tried to write on
the wall. It was the fastest way, I thought. She was
holding my hand. She didn't want to die, but I wasn’t
able to save Meredith. I didn't have a phone…

After those words (NDT: black man found... etc) I was
scared. I was covered with blood. Who would ever
believe me? She told me not to leave her alone. I
knew it because she was wailing with her arms
stretched out at me. But I was shocked. All that blood,
only on TV and in horror movies, something like this
had never happened to me before. Even now I can't
sleep. I see that sweet face covered with blood.
Why did all this happen to her, why? If only I had been
man enough I would have saved her. But I am not,
and I’m ashamed of myself. I would want to be in her
place and she'd still be alive. I could have saved her. I
dreamed of saving the world and wasn't able to save
one person. I have been selfish. I only thought of
myself and for this reason I don't deserve to live. It’s
not fair that I live and a sweet and scented flower like
Meredith has been broken, while I breathe this air, that
she should be breathing. No, it's not fair. I hope Up
There (NDT Rudy is referring to Heaven) She will
forgive me one day because I believe I'll never make it
Up There because of my cowardice. She will be a new
star, a lost angel called Meredith.