Skämta med indierna som påstår att de ringer från Microsoft.

- Hello My name is Austin I am calling from Microsoft.
- Hello Austin.
- I am here to tell you that you computer is severely infected.
- Really? Oh my god! I am so happy that you finally called me.
- Please turn on your computer, Sir.
- Of course, of course. I have been waiting for some to call for a loooong time. Boy am I glad that you called me Austin.
- Do you have your computer ready, Sir?
- Just a second, I am on it. You know I've been watching some porn and now my computer is hijacked. You are my saviour Austin... Wait am minute... are you from India?
- No, Sir, I am calling from Scotland.
- Austin, you cheeky bastard. You are not from Scotland. I can smell the curry over the telephone.
- No, Sir, I am calling from Scotland.
- Your name is not even Austin? It's Apu Nahasapimapetilon. I love indian people! They talk so funny, like little midget trolls. I love indian food. Maybe I should come to India and have a lunch with you, Apu?
- Sir, your computer is badly infected..
- Oh my god, Apu, and you can see that from India? That must be really bad!
- Sir, please open the start menu...
- Oh my oh my, this is really bad, Apu. Do you think my computer will explode to smithereens? How is the weather in India? Sunny?
- Sir, I am calling from Scotland, my name is Austin.
- Apu, are you ashamed of your indian heritage? That's just sad. You don't have to pretend to be an Austin from Scotland for people to like you. You are good as you are. Where did you call from again, old chap?
- Sir, I am calling from Microsoft, I am here to help you...
- Wow Apu your parents must be very proud of you? Working from a big company like Microsoft. What does you mother think of your job?
- (tystnad)
- Is your family proud of your profession? Do you honor your family name?
- (tysnad)
- Apuuu, say something you lazy bugger.
- Click

- Hello my name is Anthony, I can calling from a certified Mircosoft support provider.
- Hi Anthony, How can I help you?
- Sir, I here to tell you that your computer is infected with a malicious virus that is causing system errors on a daily basis.
- That's terrible, what do you think will happen? Will I go to jail for that?
- Sir, I need you to access your computer.
- Ok, hold on... My computer is running as we speak.
- Sir, you computer is causing errors our server is detecing the problem and therefore I am here to help you.
- Ok, I understand your position but you must understand the customs of my country, Anthony. For us to do business I need you to disclose certain information. Do we understand eachother?
- Yes, Sir, I need you to click on the button with the windows logo on your desktop...
- Anthony, I will do exactly as you have instructed me to, but first I need you to provide me some important information.
- Sir, you must understand...
- I need to know the size of your penis. Do you understand what I am saying? In my country we only do business with people that have a large penis. So please tell me the size of your penis. Remember, it's customary in my country.
- (Tystnad)
- Anthony, tell me, do you have a big och small penis?
- Hey, don't play smart.
- Anthony, you are disrespecting my country's culture. That's no way of making business. How can I place any trust in you?
- Fuck you - click -

- Hello my name is David I am calling from Windows support.
- Hello David, you just did a very rude thing. You interruped me when I was masturbating.
- I am here to tell you that your personal computer...
- I don't have time with you David, I masturbating to porn right now. Do you understand? I am busy jerking off