Kvinnor njuter av att bli våldtagna!

I want to try dressing really sexy, obviously "looking for it" and going to a divey bar or bad part of city, a wild party(I kind of did this), something like that and try to work a guy (or guys!) up to rape me. Pretend to be a little drunk or out of it. Or act sort of helpless. Not sure what I would say to them to do it. But like in a bar, part of it would be like teasing obviously aggressive guys who wouldn't take no and going outside with them. Not preplanned or safe words or any of that. I have done some roleplay and have loved that. This seems like a kind of next step to trying to experience the real danger of it.
I've read about women doing stuff like this who would never admit it, so I hope there's some out there that can tell me how they did it. I have NOT done it (yet) but admitting I want to is making me think of it more.

I know this. I know I'm only 23 but I do get how badly this could go for me. I think I wrote somewhere that this is something I thought about for years, since I was a teenager and by that I mean 14 or 15, not 19. I haven't gone into some of the things I've already done that might help you all see how far I've gone. I had a boyfriend once bring over two guys I didn't know to "gangrape" me. I fought all 3 of them and they held me down, pulled my clothes off, no protection, the whole thing. We did have a safeword but I never used it. It was one of the hottest things I ever did and after it was over, I kept thinking it wasn't far enough. I was 20 then.

Yes, I have. I said a couple times that I realize I am putting myself in real possible danger. It's part of the thrill for me, I think. I'll have some control because I'll try to approach/provoke guys that I want, but I know some guy could join in or follow me. But that could happen anyway, right?
Being smacked around doesn't bother me too much. Losing a tooth would totally suck, so would a broken bone. But no risk, no reward as they say.

I think that's why this is tricky. I'm trying to find the guy/s who won't stop but also won't hurt me more than they have to to rape me.

Went to a bar/nightclub a ways from me that doesn't have a good rep, had a couple drinks and acted more drunk than I was. Flirted with a couple REALLY assholic guys, tattoos, acting jerky, drunk, the whole thing. I heard them calling me stupid bitch when they thought I couldnt hear. I made out a little bit with both of them where people could see, then backed off and said I was going. They followed me out to my car and tried making out with me some. That's when I started pushing them away and saying I just wanted to go home. And it...got...bad. I was on the ground, bleeding from my nose before I realized he had slapped me really hard. One guy pulled me up and the other took my keys and opened my car and shoved me in the back seat. I was really scared but realizing it was realy happening at the same time. I was telling them please not to and could get pregnant and all this. They took turns on me in the back of my car and then walked back in the bar. I laid there a long time (I think? time got really weird) and then went home. I know I could have got hurt a lot worse but ohmygod it was pretty much what I was hoping for. I think thats all I can say for now. I needed time to think about it and what I would say on here. I don't know why I'm posting about it other than I said I would and there's a few girls I met on here who said they do or did the same thing or want to, so just saying for them that I did it. I KNOW this was dangerous and way out of the norm so just understand it was something I needed to try. AMA? I guess.

I met a few women on here who did the same thing or want to. And a bunch of guys who know girls who did or did it to them.

Other than a bloody nose and a bunch of bruises, yeah. I don't know exactly how to describe it. It was a lot what I expected but it's like a weird dream. I still can't believe I went through with it.

This has me shocked. Would you do it again?

Yeahhhhh, thats the question. I am still reliving this over and over and thinking about it. The best I can say is...I don't know. I think I want to.

At any point were you afraid for your life?
Did you think through in the beginning whether they would get too violent with you, and that you wouldn't be able to stop it?


Yes to all of that. Not for my life maybe. I had pepper spray with me and there was a couple times I could have used it. And its the superstrong kind you can get online. Maybe that was like my safeword. This probably won't make sense to anyone, but part of why I didnt use it was cause I think I felt bad for them. Like I got them to do this and now I'm attacking them?
But there were a couple times I was afraid I would get really hurt. Once he hit me though, after that it was obvious they just wanted to fuck me. They weren't trying to beat me or anything once they had me in the back of my car. Threatening, yeah. At one point I was crying and it was intense and one guy said, Hey shut up! You shut up and let us do this and we leave. You keep that shit up and get hurt. Ok?
It was the "ok" that kinda gave me a whoa moment. It was almost like he wanted me to agree or was making a deal or something.
They said a lot of other stuff. Some of it was almost funny. The weirdest part was when I came. The first time. I guess the guy heard me? I was trying to be quiet about it. I could hear them like laughing and saying something to each other but they were outside the car then.

Damn!
Thanks for this. It's just a shame about them punching you in the nose.

It hurt, yeah, but to be honest it's a little of what I wanted. I wanted them to have to fight a little for it. It did totally shock me though when it happend. I was literally on the ground and one was pulling me back up before I felt the hit to my face and my nose bleeding. That was the only time I felt better bringing the pepper spray.

There was a lot of different times when I was excited about it. Getting dressed before I left and knowing I was really finally going thru with it. Getting to the bar. Seeing the guys I wanted to do it. I was totally wet by the time they started kissing me at the bar and knowing people saw and it would make it harder for me to say anything later.
My panties were really wet when they got me out by the car but I don't think they noticed cause they just pulled them off me. I guess they threw them away cause i couldnt find them. Maybe kept them?

There was a lot of different parts to the sexy. When they shoved me in my car and felt the guy grabbing my legs and pulling my panties off down my legs. I still feel that now when I think about it. I guess thats when I knew they were going to fuck me and that I didnt want to stop them, that I really wanted this to happen and feel it!
There was a point right after he shoved into me and I could hear him. It was like, "uhmm, fuck, good" or something like that. That's when I came the first time. I think it was knowing he was liking me, getting off on doing this to me.
Wow, there's so many different parts. I keep thinking about all of it and going over it and there's a lot more. But is that what you asked?
Edit: it's helping me figure out how i feel about it going through it more. i dont know if you'll get this but I have been going over this for days since it happened and realize I'm just staring off reliving parts of it. And, umm, doing stuff to myself. Y'know!