PsychoChillers egna texter

Här kommer jag att posta mina försök till raptexter så att jag är säker på att dom finns bevarade någonstans, jag är nämligen rätt slarvig av mig. Detta gör jag bara för att det är roligt och för att bli bättre, jag har alltså inga planer på att bli rappare och således kommer jag inte att skriva några hooks. Det jag vet med mig att jag måste förbättra är formatet och flerstaviga rim. Just nu skriver jag nästan uteslutande enkla rim i ett svårrappat format. Jag lyssnar på väldigt lite svensk hiphop och kommer därför att skriva på engelska. Till en början kommer jag inte att hålla någon 16 bars-regel eller liknande utan jag kan komma att posta något som kan vara en, två eller halv vers för att sedan fortsätta i på samma text om jag har skrivit mer i samma stil. Nåväl.

Mitt första försök är lite partyrap:

this is me 101 the super cunt solution
cum have fun as we break out the lotion
trust your first notion drink this here potion squeeze a couple of buns and proceed with no caution, you're in my world now life begins and ends in abortion, an everlasting state of mental distortion, the supafly ouroboros of knives, DUI's, fights no flights except overnights to Bangkok to bang bitches with cocks
crush another moon rock, the secret to success is protected by a well-worn lock
my stash opens for cash or a lubed up ass female, male it's all fine fuck after a line I'll impale passing by bovine, I turn water to wine the golden kind with a hint of pine, a texas hold'em mind all in all the time tell your sister it's fine when you share this shower of mine

Här kommer en text som får mig att låta som en jävla gnällröv. Sista rimmet slängde jag bara in för att få något sorts avslut, det kanske ryker eller byggs ut i framtiden. Fast jag hoppas att jag blir bra nog att tycka att mina första texter är skit.

no friends like Boyd friends with droids,
don't fuck with noids but still paranoid, mind void nothing there for a Betazoid,
a life wasted driven deep in the dirt,
stomped by the world an ugly upskirt,
I love drugs like Terry loves yoghurt,
my skin's burning pale and hugs hurt,
the wind turning sets off a red alert,
ambitions inert but for a reverse birth,
I insert suspicions and escape like Kurt,
no place on earth to hide from my visions,
a stiff upper lip is an impossible mission,
angry like Fifth an explosive failed rift,
adrift in the future but stuck in the past,
try to move past it but the space is vast,
between the cast that holds up the casts,
so long it's been this struggle and strife,
need a knife to feel in this deceased life,
an oxymoron and I do oxy like a moron,
a watchman forlorn who whishes he'd never been born

Sablar vad svårt det här är. Vilka jävla genier dom bästa lyricisterna måste vara, jag bryter nästan hjärnan när jag försöker knåpa ihop mina simpla texter. Jag får in fler och fler flerstaviga rim men dom räcker inte många rader och jag har stora problem med att få till snygga övergångar. Nåväl, här kommer en väldigt specifik text. Ni som fattar fattar.

it all started with a faggot reading poetry then expanded into homicidal rivalry, on the way it got hairy though I gotta say enough to make it questionable for any pay, Powers, Principalities, Thrones and Dominions and a former fed battling the Devil and his minions, blood in his inner visions help him see what the killer sees as clear as day, but it can be a curse like two six eight that crushes him under it's weight, another day another pickup for the hearse but when it's a friend it's so much worse, scares the wife away after a kidney is delivered on a tray and all is immersed, in evil and the worst demon in the Legion can't be stopped by any legal means, you need a Group with financial means and people like Black Watts and Means with special abilities, to fight back fulfill prophecies and unearth history in swamps in Germany, to fight the nurse and the judge and the lawyer the many who holds a grudge from hell, in the market he saw her and Pepper and Martin he was warned by Crocell, just sit back and relax and do nothing 'cause he's coming and that is a fact but in fact, he must act as a result of the mark on his hand carved by a man tortured by humming, the mark of a beast starved of the pleasure of murder and mayhem anticipating the coming, he who walks on the line will eventually cross it and the Polaroid Man found that it cost him, no boxes of wine or talks or ticking time can mend the toxic sublime of willful murder, no Doomsday Defense helps when he's on the fence and the Old Man is murdered, he who taught him the lesson of balance struck out when the Group got punked by Odessa, roll the dice again and again test a virus stress a friend hide in a cabin the motive was wrong, the Alfa and the Omega can't refuse the Siren's song and we find out the Butler did it all along

Nästa text är typisk skrytmachorap.

you think you can do drugs like me evict slugs munch rugs get an extra tug for free, take a hike before I set my dogs loose pugs to bully you up a tree, chop you down like my name is Lee you ooze to much clown still take a knee, there's no such thing as equality I'm the boss man let's crank it up booze has no effect on me, I put a spell on you like Thinner it's in my blood the price to pay for being a sinner, put on my cape and make you watch me rape that stank fur cunt Merwinna, no escaping hell you're rolling with me take the D and taste the juice of a winner, you might as well tape it shut you crepe eating fag you're the runt of the litter, I'm the biggest the baddest the sickest the raddest the professor to your beginner, the wickedest lickety split sized multiple orgasms vendor, meaner than a painter on the streets of Vienna I spew spit that would trip out McKenna, speed is to me what weed is to Rasta I tweak out and sic pussy like an offender, wanna learn faster study the master earn your degree in being a bastard

Den här går i samma stil som den förra så den får väl gälla som fortsättningen. Den här är jag nog minst nöjd med hittills men jag tror det var Stephen King som sa man ska tvinga sig att skriva varje dag även om det blir skit. Han sa kanske inget om att posta all skit man skriver men va fan.

I'm the illest villain born to plunder and pillage a Boogeyman killer from legends told in Normandic villages, so lock up your daughter before I fill her I'll fuji nine the bitch so bad I'm straight outta thriller, if she gets frantic I promise I'll still her with my cock up her ass she'll be as chill as a Miller, forgive the intrusion I'm such an Attila it's just my typical antics like Coke with vanilla, I solved cold fusion like I was cooking Barilla my dealer's out of stock I'm a community pillar, steal a wheel and roll out to my magic villa stuck in the middle of the illest and one even iller, impunity for all but the worst kiddy diddler suck on my bratwurst I'm a bona fide Riddler, when I bust a nut the force of my load sends jizz over the roof and knocks down a fiddler, flaccid this no way be the highest bidder give it a kiss and it'll grow even bigger

Jag tycker att det är fan så svårt att skriva långa texter utan hook men den här blev längst hittills i alla fall. Tror jag. Men särskilt smidig blev den inte, hur jag än försöker rappa den får jag inget bra flow.

lived life in the fast lane since I was a kid crushed bottles on the bike lane God forbid, I should learn something I could use later to cool for school turned into insane, King Kong player turned manic masturbator when I saw my first thong she saw me drool, been a perv ever since master manipulator perpetrating assaults always suave like Prince, rape strikes a nerve with women but I'm the real victim of a biting libido try fighting that credo, when all you see is legs and tits and ass and shining hairless skin on a supple fragrant lass, so instead of throwing a fit can you understand why my life is one big blatant razzmatazz, a sped up cash machine for hoes showing my dick is how I take my stand against the prude ruling class, but oh shit I went off track I turned my fly party rap into a misogynistic nappy sack, so let's get back on O Track I miss you it just ain't the same since you got whacked, let's get mystic charged 'n' ballistic or downright cooked like a slow cooked brisket, I got your back if you got mine I got that black tar that'll bend your spine, inject feel the effect dragging you down stopping your breath and freezing time, in the back of the bar head on the table like a specimen to dissect but look up here comes Death, passing by 'cause we're fully able to hold our shit this ain't a moral story we ain't in no fable, we take it straight from the laboratory get fucked up chasing zombies like Coral plus hella horny, agoraphobic motorheads smoking shit that ain't for dreads listening for the feds, sweaty sex in dirty beds glistening beads on our foreheads as the fisting commence, that's life and she ain't no bitch treat her like me and she'll get you off with no hitch, do a hot knife and it all makes sense don't mind the smell my crib is crack house kitsch, I got speed that'll tweak you so hard you crack your ribs but all is well in white trash hell, rack 'em up bottles and syringes bite down and ingest the pill of your dreams, psychedelics that'll make you go off the hinges and rip the seams from reality colorful braille for vitality, watch out here comes the bill out to kill just for the thrill no free will in the blue company, jump out the back run like Forrest leave the stack whip out the cordless dial my homie meet up in the forest, smoke and chill bong paper blunts or vapors it's all good just take the edge off then back to the hood, as dawn cracks like so many rocks it's time to think about the body clock I feel a little tired, should get some sleep so I wake ready to go haywire on a brand new day restart the fire

I smoke trees but I ain't no B kick butt hard but I ain't no G,
sell drugs just little ol' me no heir to the Escobarian dynasty,
elbow deep in depravity like double G you can bury me with ol' Jim B,
off the chain speak so free like FMG
to fuck with me is insanity,
chrome is for G's but I got something else that'll silence thee,
a MOAB covered in debris aimed straight at your family,
I like it raw like ODB bring your shorty so I can fill her cavity,
got an affinity for popping cherries I fuck 'em sweet I fuck 'em gently,
float like a butterfly sting like a bee smoothly lethal like Muhammad Lee,
you'll pay for your insolence if you insult me my dawgs heed the Jaffa Kree,
bitches be all like daddy gee fuck my ass if my pussy bleeds,
and faggots be all like I wish he'd switch teams so he could fuck me,
that's just me an oddity a crude but lovely singularity

Ska kanske nämna det att jag är en ganska ordinär svennebanan, så allt som låter det minsta "gangsta" är egentligen något annat. Det kan vara ordlekar, kulturella referenser, ironi, satir, kritik, ren humor eller, kanske, i sällsynta fall ett anekdotiskt rim som inte betyder att jag gör anspråk på en kriminell livsstil. Nåväl, jag har inte skrivit på ett tag så här är en kort en jag klämde ur mig ikväll:

I'm not from the ghetto but I know the lingo, sail under the radar forgettable like Ringo, quick with the stiletto every jab is bingo, gung ho fo' hoes like a mongo fo' Kung Po, but chill like Chet when dealing with po-po, I'm no gangsta I'm just a po' boy tap yo' feet while I rap like Jo' Fo', when I'm done you'll be as dead as disco a dodo spontaneous photos, they'll put out a bolo on you mofos but you'll be gone like Toto, I'll be doing lines in the bar and take the whiskey to gogo, my flow flows more natural than Bono sucking dick in a Soho dojo

a missionary in the latter days sent to fuck your mother raw like Corey Chase, not easily offended got no beef with gays Gandalf was a fag and he could blaze, so drag up be smug and try the newest craze of being all up in my face, I drag you down to earth make you feel the girth of a man who can't be triggered, but just in case I hid AIDS infected grenades in your mayonnaise, this is the end of days soon there'll be raids aimed at people with a sense of humor, mindless drones targeting those of us with massive funny bones cutting them out like tumors, yes Your Honor I thought it was funny as fuck to name my bull Connor, rumor has it I'm a goner but before I leave I'll leave a legacy to carry me yonder, in the spirit of Loke aka not so low key I'm gonna shit all over this world like GG, light a joint and grab your crotch to invoke me try to keep up in this bizarre hokey pokey, shoot smack snort speed crash bars drop E's fuck hoes smoke weed steal cars collect STD's, gotta catch 'em all brain rotted out from syphilis so bad I use midgets like fidget spinners in pub brawls, I gotta drink before I crawl grab the twitchiest bitch and pass that shit along in the center stall, who you gonna call when I'm in the bathroom giving my syphilis to the next Lauren Bacall, Richie Rich rich in immunodeficiency eating a itching clit with devastating efficiency, accusations roll off me like Jar B ex-squeeze me why you complain mesa paid the fee

there's a club for pussies with low self-esteem wife beaters and dykes who cream at the sight of blood and batons beating spleens, they stalk the streets and if you see 'em you best beat feet before you get beat for not staring at your feet, the color of evil's dark blue it represents a state funded pistol packing criminal crew I wish they'd turn the gun on themselves and press undo, they'll commit any criminal act be it murder assault or rape and walk free that's a straight up fact we're under attack, if you smoke pot you might get got in Sweden it's legal to make a headshot if you're a cocksucking bitch ass cop, they ain't got the spunk to confront gangbangers but they'll gun down a drunk citizen wielding coat hangers, cluck cluck you yellow fuck your friends cried when Jackie gave 'em a pipe to suck wut wut wutcha gonna do when a thousand Jackies come for you

Blackzippa meet Jack the Rippa in spirit anyway/'cause you make me wanna go Sean Renard and flip out/I wanna wear your face as a kippah/invoke the ass rape Golem open your zipper/make ready your mangina dip her in a tub of lard/you're like a fat kid with bad breath/who beats his wife and cheat at cards/your mother I ripped her/your father you mean your brother/I ran him over twice with different cars/Blackzippa where's my tip huh/maybe in your sisters mouth or on her clit bruh/you can watch if you like as I stretch her slit out/but maybe you won't since you're a little faggot/you're not one of the boys who screamed don't when y'all got raped by the abbot/and now you rape your own kids how sad is that/Blackzippa's life comes full circle with you wearing your daughter's ass for a hat

Tom Hardy you faggoty piece of shit end of a colonoscopy your acting is mockery/I'll throw you off the balcony and jerk off to your scream as you lose to gravity/Bono's still alive oh no I'mma put an end to you pro bono and make it so slow/so long Mr. This Is Not a Rebel Song I'mma revel in your pain when I clip your cloven tongue with tongs/Watain you poser sons of whores anyone with half a brain knows you're light weight like Coors/you're supposed to hate life but take selfies with Carola what's next So Much Better and ads for Coca Cola/Peter Jackson you fucked with the King when the klaxon sounds I'mma fill you with bling/that movie left a Bad Taste in my mouth for that your fat face'll have to go a bout/Bianca you no talent crypto ugly fuck I pray that someone'll rip yo' panties and fill your tunnel up with Tonka Trucks/your mother's famous or was back in the stone age your whole family's so heinous I might kill all y'all in a fit of rage/